Basedreams.com March 2010 Newsletter

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Basedreams.com Newsletter

August 09

G’day all you knob gobblers out there,

The big fella upstairs must have felt sorry for me because life has been going a little too perfect lately. I haven’t broken a bone in ages, but just like the world trade center bombings, I know the big one is coming. But in the mean time here is some of the bullshit that I have been up too…

After my collarbone healed I managed suck on enough sausage to get my job back in Africa. With a job comes certain responsibilities and those include spending all my new pay checks on travel. And travel I did.

A few of us spent our usual month in Northern Norway ripping up the cliffs and spending way too much money on alcohol. There was an amazing crew this year and some pretty amazing jumps but we all found our new love provided by the legendary Dr Willy Wonka. Lets just say that Belgium chocolate suddenly was the cause of the munchies, yum yum!!

The world base race was on as well but we were too busy in our own world to worry about who was the fastest and the best. It’s all about who is the silliest and most wasted for us these days.

We did get the chance to throw a bit of a world record base jump in there though. 49 jumpers at once. It was a super cruisy crew of solid jumpers and although it was like trying to herd cats sometimes, it all came together pretty easily. I heard rumours of a 100 way for 2010. I’m looking forward to chaos and carnage on that one hee hee!!!

After a month of work watching sharks eat fish and whales eyeing off the natives it was off to the USA to teach Jackie to base jump.

After an epic ordeal with buying the van from a dodgy used car salesman called Dan we were on our way to twin falls and the most boring base jump on the planet. I was trying to go in every jump just to try and raise my heart beat but as per usual I failed. Don’t get me wrong though, it is always awesome fun there.

Jackie had a ball, she could show up all you blokes out there with how solid she is on exit, and it was a pleasure to watch her quickly turn into a good and solid base jumper. There were a few bumps and scratches in between but that’s what it’s all about.

We also hit Moab for her first cliff jump off the classic “Tombstone” and again she was perfect. We also had time to go speed flying with the crew in Salt Lake City, which was epic fun.

Unfortunately we also had time to find out that if you leave half an ounce of Gak in the Utah heat it will turn to chewy. I think we were ahead of our time inventing Gak chewy but it still did the job all the same.

We also checked out the Grand Canyon. One word…..fucking BIG!

Then it was off to Bridge Day, West Virginia where the weather was shit but the parties were flowing and I learnt a very important lesson. Don’t take lollies from strangers, especially if that stranger is Spacey Tracey. One word, “mushrooms”. It was a great way to get to know my new friend Matt Gold as well. One more word to throw in there, “intense.” Love your work though Tracey!
I can’t thank everyone enough who we met along the way on our epic USA trip so thanks very much to all you guys. You are all awesome!!!!

I had now done three months of work for the year and figured I needed a long break so I headed to Thailand for a month of climbing, jumping, diving, and partying with my friends biscuit, Lisa, Sarah and a whole heap of other cool crew from around our wonderful planet.

High lights include opening up a new cliff called “the heart of darkness”, jumping the Taiwan wall, A full moon jump on a super high tide doing a shipwreck dive and diving with sharks. And finally after 33 years on this planet I finally learnt how to roll a fucking joint. Yey!!!!!!!!!!! Being stoned is the best way to play the game jungle speed that’s for sure! A month is way too short to be staying on Tonsai that’s for sure.

After going wakeboarding on my last day in Thailand it was time to head to Oz to fatten up on Xmas day with the family. As per usual I was hung over from a party with the boys from the night before. With Xmas out of the way it was time to hang out on Carly and Theo’s boat over new years on the Hawkesbury, it doesn’t get any cooler than that I tell you.

Oh wait, yes it does because it was time to go to Sumatra on a 3-week surfing expedition to the Mentawais.

This was probably the coolest trip of my entire life, cool crew, awesome fun waves and some very crazy antics, especially on shore, isn’t that right Nick!!!!!!!!!
It would take a whole other news letter to describe how cool this trip was. It was just that fucking good. It is always fun to hang out with Ted as usual. One day he will evolve and stand up but in the mean time he is ripping.

Big fucking thankyous to everyone involved especially Scuzz. It was priceless to watch everyone surfing on acid. Who says you can’t bring drugs into Asia!!!!

So it was back to Oz for a couple of weeks to make myself look like a complete fool on a TV show called Australian story. The crew involved were great to work with but at the end of the day it is going to be hard to polish a turd!!! Look out for it in April. On the ABC and the Internet.

My book of bullshit “Confessions of an idiot” has been selling well and we have made millions of dollars from it, all of which will not be going to charity. Just kidding. There is no money being made but it has been a good experience over all even though it’s a bit stressful. I can’t thank Jeremy enough for his tireless effort and support through all this for basically no reward at all. I think everyone who has bought one owes him a beer!

So that’s it for now, I am stuck in Paris because they won’t let us get into Africa to work. It was freezing while I was sight seeing but the hip flask of whiskey soon sorted that one out. I even got to eat a “Royale with cheese.” Oui Oui.

So what’s coming up…..

Fucking Baffin Island that’s what. It’s going to be the sickest expedition ever with the coolest crew. I’m planning on having my way with a polar bear, but I’m not stupid, I will be getting Wildman to hold its head!!!!

Who is going to die on this trip? That’s the million dollar question, stay tuned and find out on www.baffinbase.com “Bags not.” Ha Ha, I said it first!
If I can stay alive it’s going to be a big year of both business and pleasure.
And if you’re from the UK, listen out for the word “DIM SIM” because Jason and me just bought the trademark to the word and it’s coming to a fish and chip store near you!!!

So remember kids, drugs are heaps of fun and really safe,
up until the point where you overdose and DIE!!!!!!

Up ya bums to all the living
And lots of love to all the dead

Love
Douggs